Last time, with the help of my fellow Culprits, we posted 7 of the Best Demn Teedeez that Kate Upton, the Queen of Bulging Breasts, has (thanks to King Rubiano’s wisdom, of course). Today, it’s my pride and pleasure to introduce to you my ever-favorite Canadian actress, Rachel McAdams. And before the "The Time Traveller's Wife” goes further with her decisions on changing her wardrobe, if she is to be given the opportunity to travel back in time, to which I don't give a fuck, let this be a hallmark of how beautiful she really is.
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Ah, isn't she beautiful? |
Although I'm not into Nicholas-Sparks-Gay-Shit-Love-Stories, I still chose to watch film adaptations of his books. Why? Because of Rachel McAdams. Simple. As a matter of fact, this is just a random notion that randomly came into my bird brain (thanks to Marlboro Lights, I can barely remember the last time I took a dump). So yeah, I suddenly figured out that it’s “About Time” for me to let the world know that beauty doesn't necessarily mean having breasts that are almost as big as your ego. Well, at least, I didn't use the term Watermelon. On the other hand, I really don’t like the fact that her character, Irene Adler, is killed in the movie Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows. It just sucks!
So, without further ado, lo and behold the woman that every Lady Gaga should follow, Rachel McAdams.
#7. The Wedding Crashers
I do love Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn. There's no doubt about it. But then, Rachel McAdams is here; it’s a different story. Well, my faith in movies has been finally restored. Seriously, who am I to shun such goddess? Dude, she caught my attention so well that I even forgot to wash my underwear. Honestly speaking, I never knew that she is part of this movie. So yeah, at first, I was just watching it for the sake of having a good laugh on a cold and shivering Saturday night. However, things became different when I saw her. So, a chilling Saturday evening plus a movie date with Rachel McAdams is a boner alert!
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| Collider If I were to crash a wedding, it would be Rachel's |
#6. Mean Girls
Okay, some of you (just like what my Twilight lover friend told me) might say, “What? You watched Mean Girls?” I know you’ll be asking such while thinking if Lindsay Lohan has some shit on me. Oh no, you are completely wrong my friend. First of all, who in the world would love Lindsay Lohan? Of course, there are always those stupendous groups of individuals, so yeah, them. I really don’t mind it at all, though. Rachel McAdams made me watched Mean Girls, just saying. Imagine: With her age during that time (of which I’m sure is at her late 20’s) could still bring the brattiness to an extreme. And this is not to mention how hot she looks when wearing those skirts. Damn, I’m gradually turning into a werewolf. Oh well, good thing the movie producers thought of having Rachel on their movie because if not, the fuck would this even be a hit.
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| Hotflick So, what if I'm 34 years old? I bet I'm sexier and prettier than those cobwebbed-faced 20's. |
#5. The Notebook
As what I’ve mentioned, I really hate Nicholas Sparks -- 10,000 Niggawatts, that is (thanks William Haul for this one). I can even remember how proud my classmates were while reporting about this gay author’s life during one of our literature classes. Some of them were like, “Oh my god. Isn’t his books full of love and romance?” See how it felt like to be part of the system? For literature’s sake, of course, bitch! Nicholas Sparks is a desperate hag known for making girl’s wet. And thanks to filmmakers who happen to believe in Sparks’ notion of love, they even had them into movies. Ironically, I enjoyed Spark’s piece. Rachel McAdams poisoned me. Hence I became part of the system for more or less 2 hours.
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| Catherine Victoria See? She doesn't need Upton's tits at all. |
#4. The Vow
See number 3 for this part.
P.S Channing Tatum's a real Magic Mike indeed.
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| Mondo de Musica Your smiles... please... STAPH... |
#3. Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows
Here’s another epitome of irony in my life. Personally speaking, I don’t find Sherlock Holmes interesting. Not that I hate Arthur Conan Doyle as much as I hate Nicholas Sparks, but I just don’t have the urge to enjoy his works. I don’t know. And for that, my apologies to all Doyle lovers; I know your hero is far too different from Sparks. And I need not to convey the (obvious) reasons. Going back to my heroine Rachel McAdams, her role here is really exceptional. Yup, if you just know what I mean. Imagine the level of her exceptionality: She gets killed easily, and so is her presence in the movie. Now, would you not deem it an exceptional one? Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows, however, glued me to my seat. Later did I realize that Doyle is no longer an issue for me. Thank you, Rachel. Thank you.
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| Fanpop Just why did you have to kill me? Did Doyle approve it? I bet not. |
#2. The Time Traveller's Wife
Because I got so fucked up thinking that time travelling, in one way or another, would be possible, I wasn’t reluctant in downloading this movie. Trust me. There was this time when my brain suddenly perceived a memory of an old friend. Basically, this friend of mine, whom I shall dub Barney (yes, the purple pedophile dinosaur), had this baby thesis way back in high school. And believe it or not, the motherfucking dimwit deduced that time travelling can be achieved. To my surprise, he even presented data and whatsoevers just to back up his peculiar discovery. Now, with all the debates about which came first: egg or chicken, how the hell would Barney think of such study when in fact he doesn’t know the answer to why her mother piss at night? By that being said (not the mom-pissed-at-night puzzle), I decided to watch “The Time Traveller’s Wife.” But then again, this would not be possible if it wasn’t for Rachel McAdams.
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| Collider Now, tell me: Would you still be busy travelling in time? |
#1. About Time
Well, it seems that Rachel McAdams and time travelling is meant to be connected. Again, there’s this movie that perhaps projects the idea of which only through time travelling can one shag her. Don’t blame me; her movies made me conclude such theory. And if you’ll watch “About Time,” you’ll surely be jealous of Domhnall Gleeson. This is most especially if you find yourself more good looking than this Irish actor. However, since you’re only capable of dreaming and complaining, you could not help, but cry. You should be happy, though. Rachel McAdams is in-front of you – not physically, of course. Remember, you’re inside a movie house. So, wipe those tears, stop biting those fingernails, and straighten up. You never know when that Rachel McAdams of yours would appear.
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| Hollywire It's really about time to show that bitch who's beautiful here. |
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