7 Reasons Why Manny Pacquiao is Just Way Better Than Floyd Mayweather Jr.

If it wasn't for William's "Once There Was a Man Named Manny Pacquiao," I wouldn't have the courage to get out of my closet and defend my country's pride against the inevitable "Dark" wrath of Floyd Mayweather Jr. So, thanks buddy for the eye-opener. Now, let me just do my thing.

                                                                                                            Opposing Views

If only Manny Pacquiao could just wipe the black out of him...

Apart from being deemed as one of the greatest boxers the world ever has, Manny Pacquiao resembles a characteristic that makes him entirely different from other athletes especially Floyd Mayweather Jr. Well, not only has he become a laughing stock to most Filipinos (which is quite ironic); the boxing legend has also given every individual, Mexican mostly, the notion to never bitch around with a Southpaw specialist. Is it right, Morales? Barrera? Margarito? The list goes on, and although Marquez did put Pacquiao to sleep, he surely tasted the Mexicutioner’s fists, undeniably.

                                                                                            Fan Share

Anyway, just like what the most of you has been endearingly wishing, I want Manny to give Floyd a dose of his own medicine: That never shall a “Pretty Boy” dare to fuck things with a street fighter especially if he doesn't have what it takes to fight a Manny Pacquiao. Of course, that is why he (Mayweather) fabricates thousands, if not millions, of alibis just to free himself from the demise he would get courtesy of Manny Pacquiao. So, no matter how he clamors and boasts his undefeated record, Manny Pacquiao still has the very reasons to be a notch higher than him. And this does not only mean fighting inside a ring, well, something like…

#7. Manny Pacquiao Has the Big Novelty Song Writer, Lito Camo, on His Side

                                                                                            All Music

Give shit to where shit is due. Shit!

If you’re one of those kids singing, “Bakit Papa?” and “Otso-Otso,” you surely know who Lito Camo is. I can even remember dancing to one of his beats when my eyes were yet open to the truth that it’s not cool. Really. And yeah, truth hurts. Anyway, he has been one of the prominent leeches (not to mention, you know, his brother, Bobby) in Manny’s life ever since his golden days rainbowed. Also, Lito Camo is the core reason why the hairs of your skin don’t stand up and/or you don’t feel any Goose bumps or, at least, excitement whenever Pacquiao enters the arena. Remember “Para Sayo Ang Laban Na To?” Uhuh, that’s exactly the song I’m referring to. It’s a good thing, though, because unlike Floyd Mayweather Jr. who has Justin Bieber bitching around him. Well, if that’s the case then, I’ll go with Lito Camo. “Para sayooo…. Ohhhh…”

#6. Manny Pacquiao is Really Persistent... Like in Singing

                                                                                                                              ESPN
"Do you want me to sing some Ariel Pineda's?"

Ironic as it may seem, but one thing that astonishes me is Pacquiao’s persistency on areas, well, he’s not quite awesome. Seriously, it does amaze me. Imagine: Although his singing skills can be compared to a 2 year old boy who just learned how to sing Twinkle Twinkle star, he still has the guts to live the life of a professional singer. And not just that, people do buy his gigs. Thanks to Lito Camo’s unwavering help, our boxing hero has felt the urge to have singing as one of his initial dreams. So, what more can you ask for? Put into mind that Manny, despite the not-so-great voice of his, has released an album last 2006 entitled, “Laban Nating Lahat Ito.” Now, does Floyd Mayweather Jr. have what it takes to be a Manny Pacquiao, as a rockstar, that is? Nah, I can only imagine.

#5. Manny Pacquiao Sparks Peace During His Fights

                                                                               Filipinolosophy

No, I’m not talking about sparking peace in the boxing ring because he’s really not that when in fights. I’m pertaining to crime rates going down because, you know, Manny is just so busy pampering his opponent’s ass. Literally speaking, the whole country (Philippines) is much occupied in watching him fight on television. And this goes the same with the nation’s fugitives. They seem to stop doing their fucking dirty works because Manny is yet to be announced as the winner. And yeah, a rough estimate of 90.5 million Filipinos cease to do what they have to do because it’s another Pacquiao Day. And no fucking “Pretty Boy” (plus his hypocrite pops, Mayweather Sr.) can ever do this. Not until his arse is wiped by Manny, of course.

                                                                                                                       Fox News

"Please, Lord. Use me as a light to my countrymen, and that Floydie learns how to use alibis correctly." 

#4. Manny Performed Superior Compared to Floyd Against their Common Opponents

                                                                                                                     Telegraph
"Sigh. Floydie was right. Pacquiao's on black nigga cocaine"

Needless to say, both of these boxing legends have somehow fought with the same line of opponents, and they both have displayed a remarkable effort – that’s not debatable. However, the names of Oscar Dela Hoya, Ricky Hatton, Juan Miguel Marquez, and “Sugar” Shane Mosley (which Manny and Floyd have both defeated), have received different types of beating from the respective boxers. And although Marquez knocked the hell out of Manny on their recent bout (and that he had given Manny a tough job on their past 3 fights), we can’t deny the fact that their previous battles were all credited to Pacquiao. And this is not to picture the face that Marquez got after going fist to fist with him, just like every Mexican boxer gets after fighting the Filipino warrior. While Floyd may have been the first one to fight these men, Manny Pacquiao, on the other hand, was just exceptional as he brutally battered them. And the two, Mosley and Dela Hoya, realized it’s time to retire. By that being said, Pacquiao is not only an executioner, but yeah, a Retire-zer (you might suggest a better term).

#3. He’s an Eight-Division World Champion

                                                                                                                    Daily Mail
Ah, the good old days. Epic!

If you dimwits really think that Mayweather is the money man, go ahead and search Pacquiao in Wikipedia. Well, you know, I had to do this just to make sure that every detail is, at least, true. And because people say that stuff from Wikipedia are legit. So yeah, Manny Pacquiao is the first and ONLY boxer to acquire eight-fucking-division world champion compared to “Pretty fucking Boy’s” five-division world champion. Duh, five? What the fuck! And yeah, that’s a total of eight, bitch. Remember, it is eight (8); as in E-I-G-H-T, eight.  Oh, before I forgot, out of this E-I-G-H-T, he had won ten (10) world titles to his name. And Manny Pacquiao had even won lineal championship in four different weight classes which made him “the second highest paid athlete in the world.” Now, who has more bucks and bitches? Right, Paris Hilton?

#2. Manny Pacquiao is a Politician. Booyah!

                                                                                                                    Phil Boxing
"Hey, Floydie! Why don't yo bring yo black ass over here"

As what I’ve mentioned above, Manny’s persistency is an innate nature for him. So, aside from his singing endeavors, he was not reluctant in paving his way to politics. And alas, the winds of politics favored and embraced him as he later became a Congressman. Indeed, his boxing career, which made him famous and eyed by other individuals as a god, are undoubtedly the push he needed to win the elections. Defeating the demure distinction and beauty that Darlene Antonino has, Manny Pacquiao had surfaced as the new Congressman of Gensan, a city in the southern part of the Philippines. Of course, thanks to his loyal fans, particularly in Gensan, who thought that Pacquiao’s relentless gift-giving and/or ration is the only way to help them from starvation, and that this is how a politician should be portrayed. Well, what can I say, Darlene and later defeated congressman re-electionist, Roy Chiongbian, are left astray. But the latter’s “heavily favored candidate” didn’t favor him at all – for some Sarangani folks, that is. Oh well, Filipinos are Filipinos, and I’m pretty sure Mayweather has no such loyal army. And he should be ROYALLY pissed by now. Booyah!

#1. Manny Pacquiao Can’t be Manny Pacquiao if It Wasn’t For Mademoiselle Dionisia

"Eeerrrhhhmaaageeeehddd! Maneeee! Maneee!"

Obviously, which I will really put an emphasis to, madam Dionisia and her husband named the boxing phantom, Emmanuel “Manny” Pacquiao, when the doctor was still confused if he was a boy or a “boy?” And with that I’m thankful. Why? Because it sounds tougher compared to Mayweather’s fucking gay-ish, Floyd Joy Sinclair. What the… Joy? Sinclair? Are you kidding me or am I just too dumb to realize that it doesn’t fit to his black bald head? He could be Floyd Rambo Seagal or Steven Floyd Statham, but not Floyd Joy Sinclair. Anyway, there’s more to Mrs. Dionisia Pacquiao naming his son Emmanuel. As a matter of fact, in every boxing fight that Manny Pacquiao has got into, this lady seems to be fond of kneeling while worshipping or praying for couples of hours in-front of a religious statue.

                                                                                                      Philippine Inquirer

"Thank you Lord for Manny won tonight... and (ahem) for the new car as well. Tee Hee!"

Yes, you heard it right. Dionisia has seasoned herself to play the role of a mother begging for blessings and guidance from the Creator above as her son indulges a bloody fight. And when his son comes out victorious, she begs for a car that costs a million fucking Pesos or a piece of Prada bag, but always claims them as gifts from her ever-loving son. Ah. However, if it’s the other way around, where Manny losses, she hails every angel in the sky to touch his son, and make him understand that hey, it is time to retire (and this usually comes with a bundle of tears and heavy breathes). See, this is what makes Manny Pacquiao imbued to land his fists on those motherfuckers as much as he wants to have them embedded on Mayweather’s. Wondering why? Because he needs to buy his mom another car and Prada bag before she dies praying at her religious statue. In a nutshell, the sole secret which Mayweather doesn’t has, is having a mother that is nearly obnoxious, but far to be labeled as one.